How To Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

September 6, 2020

Are you not tired of almost everything you do being blamed on emotions simply because you are a woman? With every wrong step you take or every bad decision you make is always taken back to your emotions! Well, other women blame their foolish actions on emotions just so they can use them as an excuse. A woman can easily express their feelings and let us be honest here, they can express and use their emotions to a point of annoyance. If you do it on purpose and you enjoy being an emotional weakling then this article is not for you but if you feel you want to be able to take control of them then read along.

What is emotional intelligence?

Emotional intelligence otherwise known as emotional quotient(EQ) is the ability to recognise your emotions, understand, manage, and use them positively. It is how well you communicate and respond to other people effectively and objectively; by effectively & objectively meaning to be aware of what your emotions will do to others & be capable of controlling them in difficult situations. It is a crucial, effective life skill, and a solid foundation of success to you as a wife, a mother to your kids, as a friend, an employee, a businesswoman or a leader. Emotional intelligence has a powerful impact on your life and it is significant to help you stay self-aware and objective in the midst of your happiness or sadness.

What do you benefit from emotional intelligence?

The simplest answer to this is that it will empower you to cope with most challenges and the benefit is to have good mental and physical health. Challenges are an everyday part of life and it is how well we cope with them that sees us through. The benefit will be to achieve personal goals, to build stronger relationships and to succeed at a lot of things you plan to achieve in your life including career, work or academics.

The benefit is that as an emotionally intelligent woman you will be aware of your emotions during situations yet you will not allow those emotions to take over but rather motivate yourself to be objective or manage them for a positive outcome or results. Do ponder on that and do some self-assessment. You do not need to be an expert to see and realize the negative impact that the emotions bring into our lives. All kinds of relationships fail, people fall into depression for not coping, anxiety attacks, women businesses crumble, etc.

What can you do to improve emotional intelligence?

*Self-awareness
Be aware and acknowledge what effect your emotions have on how you think and behave. Recognise the message you are sending out to the people you are interacting with. Acknowledge or learn what triggers your negative emotions and how you react to stressful situations. Do not distance yourself from emotions but connect to them so you can understand the effect they have on your thoughts and behavior.

*Self-regulate
Take charge because you are the boss, not your feelings. How you feel can push you to make stupid decisions that will affect you negatively far longer than situations may last. I just mentioned self-awareness whereby you evaluate your reactions, if you do that then you will find a way to stay in control of stressful situations. Do not react during those emotional feelings rather respond for a better interaction.

*Self-motivate
They say motivation is like taking a bath, it never lasts. Different challenges may come every second day so you need to stay motivated. Remind yourself how you conquered before and how giving into emotions will ruin all that you achieved by far. Remember those you have motivated to do great that they look up to you and you wouldn’t want to crush or disappoint their dreams.
Remember those who want to see you fail that you can’t afford them that platform. Your attitude will always motivate others. ANYTHING to help you stay on top of your game. Being motivated during a challenge will force you to be resilient.

*Self-restrain
Practice makes perfect!! It takes practice to achieve all these and learning to restrain yourself is a way of stopping yourself from acting up foolishly. Learn to listen, pause (think about it) and respond. It will allow you time to be calm and examine how your actions will affect others.

*Takes responsibility
If you had a negative misunderstanding with someone, own up to your actions, do not ignore and work on finding a way to make amends.

*Have empathy
Empathetic people are excellent in relating to others, they avoid judging others but rather understand other people’s needs, feelings and points of view.

*Set goals and targets
Do your thinking on a pen and paper. Write down what you want to achieve and when, both long-term and short-term. Stay realistic and note what weakness you need to work on and what strengths will push you further and closer to your goals. Place this list where you can see it every day as a daily reminder and motivation.

*Maintain a positive attitude
After all that has been mentioned, what will be your next best step? When you realise all the positive outcomes all these come with you will see no other choice but to maintain the attitude. Who doesn’t want to be a success at things they do?

The above few mentioned points on how to improve your EQ are actually the characteristics of a person with high emotional intelligence. A high EQ will actually turn you into a wise person because you will make wise decisions that are thought through and turn you into a team player that most people prefer in their life. Another best skill you can achieve is a great social skill, you can’t be an emotional wreck and be great with your social skills.

In summary
Emotionally intelligent people take criticism very well and use it to improve their way of doing things. They have the ability to find solutions calmly during stressful situations. It can be achieved and will certainly make you better in handling what life throws at you. Importantly it is not about knowing your sadness or negative emotions but about how to handle them.

**IF YOU ALLOW EMOTIONS TO DICTATE YOUR DAY THEY WILL BECOME YOUR MASTER AND EVENTUALLY DICTATE YOUR ENTIRE LIFE**

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